To the guys who didn’t fight for me.

Have you ever been walked away from? Have you ever been ‘ghosted’? Nowadays it seems as though most people can answer yes to the two questions above and it got me thinking. Out of all my past relationships not one person fought for me. Relationships would end with no explanations, no warnings, with no fight to keep me in their lives. Sometimes I would receive an explanation with no closure or sometimes I’d be straight up ghosted.

If you’ve ever walked away without fighting to keep me in your life, I am here to say thank you.

You heard me right. I am grateful for you. And I am grateful for what you’ve taught me.

Was it hard being walked away from like I made no impact on my significant others life (on more than one occasion)? Yes. Was it hard to not get any sort of closure? Yes. Was it hard knowing I wasn’t worth fighting for? Yes.

Do I think everyone should experience a situation like this? Yes.

Here’s why:

Being put in a situation with multiple relationships where I was walked away from was excruciatingly painful. It made me feel like I wasn’t enough and that I would never be enough. I would constantly have the thought in my head ‘Why am I not worth fighting for?’ especially when I was so willing to fight for them to be in my life.

After years and multiple failed relationships later, I finally decided that I am worth fighting for. When you go through something like this in life it makes avoiding the question, ‘What’s wrong with me?’ almost impossible. But that’s just it. Maybe it wasn’t about me. And if it was about me, instead of thinking so negatively and sulking I decided I was going to do something about it. I changed my attitude and got to work!

Everyone has flaws. Every single one of us has something that we can work on. You may have a lot to offer someone in a relationship but it does not mean that you are perfect. You are worth fighting for. You are enough. And once you realize that you will be unstoppable.

Just because it doesn’t work out with one person does not automatically mean that you don’t have value. Sometimes people just don’t match up, no matter how much you may love someone, it has to be a mutual thing. When it does become a mutual thing, then going through all of the past heartaches will be worth it because your past is what lead you to where you currently are. I may still be single at the moment but I do know that I am worth fighting for, I will be enough for somebody someday and at some point a man won’t be willing to walk away. And until them I am enough for myself, and that’s all that really matters.

Not being fought for was the greatest thing to ever happen to me. Without that part of my life I wouldn’t have found confidence within being single. I wouldn’t have found strength. I wouldn’t have worked on bettering my flaws and would have kept my attitude the same which means I would’ve never grown. Everything happens for a reason, every experience you go through will teach you something. Past heartaches have taught me that not only am I worth fighting for but that I am worth loving. And you are too, no matter what you may feel your life has value, you have so much to offer and you are enough. Never forget that.