Do you think the way you speak about others matters?

Because it does.

The way in which you talk about a person can directly reflect back upon yourself.

Look, the world likes to talk and cruel on occasion. Sometimes we have no choice but to grow thick skin and go on with our lives. None of us are innocent, but it’s something we should be aware of.

In order to explain how this whole topic came about, I’ve got to share an experience I had:

A little while back I was on a date, we got onto the topic of past relationships, and my date was just railing on all the women he has dated in his past. Saying how awful they were and calling them names, not saying really any good thing at all. Not just about one of his past relationships, but multiple.

Needless to say this left me feeling uneasy and I genuinely felt bad about it.

I get it. I’ve dated plenty of the wrong people and haven’t always been treated the best. But to this day, I could never bring myself to sit and talk bad constantly about the men who have taken a piece of my heart. Maybe that’s naive of me to say, because it wasn’t all good with each of them, but the good in them by far out weighed the bad. Obviously there was a reason why those relationships ended but it doesn’t mean I need to only think negatively about them.

When it comes down to it, I made an observation about my date and unfortunately came to the decision that I wouldn’t want to end up with a man that only speaks negatively about the relationships he’s had in his past or speaks that way about people in general (In full disclosure, I told him this because he deserved an explanation as to why I didn’t feel the need for a second date and he appreciated the honesty-Also asked if I could blog about this and he gave me a yes and a thank you, which was very unexpected).

How he chose to speak about others, impacted his chance with me.  Again, it may not be a big deal to some, but to me I want to be with someone that can speak highly or fairly of the people that might not have treated them the best throughout life.

My intention of this blog post is not to talk about what happened on my date but to talk about what it taught me. This was a huge learning experience for me. It taught me to be more aware of how I’m speaking about others because it can make a difference. Something I say can not only make an impact on the people I’m talking about, but the people I am talking to.

We’re all learning how to get through life and I think experiences like the one I had help us to grow up and recognize that sometimes there are consequences for our actions, both good and bad. That we need to surround ourselves with people that make us feel good and be better. I’ve experienced both sides of those consequences and am happy to say that each day I’m learning more and more.

Be kind with your words. Because how you speak about others truly matters, in ways you may not even recognize.