Comparison, not valued, exhausted. These are three words to describe why I almost gave up my passion within photography all together.

Let’s be honest, Utah is oversaturated with photographers and the word competitive doesn’t even begin to scratch the surface. And I hate it. I hate that I feel like I have to compete with so many talented individuals to keep my business afloat. I don’t want to compete with others, I want to be able to support others, and personally I do, but when it comes to booking and retaining clients that’s a whole different ball game. Because there are so many people that do photography nowadays it’s almost impossible not to compare myself to other photographers within the Utah bubble. I’ve never really had issues when it comes to comparing myself to others, it hasn’t been something that’s crossed my mind but lately it has, and here’s why.

Back in June I set out a pretty hefty goal of raising $14,000 within a certain time frame, it’s probably the most vulnerable thing I have ever had to face or open up about but I figured I could use my skills and passion for photography to help me get to that goal. To read more about why I have this specific goal, click here. I’ve been able to capture some amazing memories and photos for clients that have booked in order to help me reach that goal and I am incredibly grateful. But this goal added enormous amounts of pressure on top of other heavy feelings I had been navigating. It made my passion more about the money and if I wasn’t booking as much as I liked to be, I felt like a complete failure.

I would sit and compare myself to the photographers that have thousands and thousands of followers and likes on Instagram and think, “I’ll never be that photographer on Instagram, I put more into my clients than I put into my social media or marketing and I just don’t think I’ll ever be sought out as a photographer simply due to what’s on social media. I will never have a feed that looks esthetically pleasing because I edit and cater my style to what my clients prefer.” This thought was SO dumb. Because in fact I have booked plenty of clients thanks to my Instagram and Facebook pages, but sometimes when you see others that have thousands of likes and multiple publications it becomes hard not to think about how you don’t have the same. And it’s hard not to let the thought cross your mind about about how you should just give up.

But it’s not about followers or likes, it’s about capturing memories and having a place to share my work. It’s about seeing others’ work and becoming inspired and motivated. Social media is an amazing tool for the photography world, and although it can be entirely draining, it’s also something that can fuel my passion in so many different ways. So I stopped comparing myself to other well known photographers in the state and within the social media world and started focusing on ways it can inspire me.

Onto not feeling valued. Sometimes I don’t think people realize just how much goes into photography. The cost of equipment, the cost of editing programs, the cost of gas, milage that goes onto my car, the amount of time it takes to not only capture the photos but also to sift through, edit, upload and send the photos, paying more in taxes than what you are making, etc. All things that should factor into pricing. Even moreso sometimes I think people may not realize how much I genuinely care about each and every single one of my clients. I want to be invested in them, not just someone that took photos for them. I want to capture memories that will live on and be cherished forever. I want my clients to feel valued and appreciated. Which is why I choose not to charge what I actually should be charging. It’s why I choose to stay up for hours on end and pull multiple all-nighters in order to get edits back quickly. I hate waiting around for photos back from my photographers, so why would I make my clients do that?

I cannot tell you how many times people have told me, “You need to raise your prices.” “You don’t charge nearly enough.” “Wow I’ve never seen a wedding package that includes what you do.” “You are not charging what you are worth.” And all of those statements might be true, as the years have gone on I have raised my pricing and will likely continue to do so simply because I am worth more than I charge but in the same breath, I never got into this passion of mine for the money. It is something that has lead to financial opportunities for me, it is a business and I would like to pursue my passion full time one day. Which means paying my bills with the money I make doing photography. It will never solely be about the money. It’s about being able to provide affordable photography and capture memories that can be cherished for a lifetime. It’s about staying inspired and challenging myself as a photographer, it’s about capturing those moments that can be looked back on. I went through a phase where I felt like my photography had no value and I seriously contemplated giving it up for good. But then I received a simple and sweet text from a past client and friend of mine that reminded me exactly why I became passionate about this industry in the first place. I was reminded that capturing memories for others and serving others in that way fulfills me with joy and happiness. I was reminded that my photography has more than enough value and that it isn’t something I can just walk away from. It’s a part of my heart now.

Going through all of the above and debating back and forth on if I should still be pursuing this passion has been mentally exhausting to say the least. I’m happy to say that I’ve now realized that I am so incredibly lucky to say that I am passionate about my photography business and every single time I book a client it gives me butterflies, I feel honored, trusted and excited. Not everybody loves what they do in life but I can honestly say that my passion within photography is something that I love with every once of my heart. I love that I get to do something consistently that makes me happy, so many people in this world aren’t that lucky.

I just want to thank all of my amazing clients and friends that have allowed me to capture memories for them and those that have believed in me enough to help me make my passion within photography into a career. I am so incredibly grateful for you. Because of you my passion will live on for a long while and I will not be giving it up any time soon.

With that being said, I am itching to get out be creative. I have some fun concepts in mind for individual portraits, bridals, in home couples’ and pregnancy announcement sessions so if you want in on a sweet collaboration reach out to me!

Don’t forget to follow my photography Instagram here and like my photography Facebook page here! It may be a simple gesture but the support means the world to me!